After much ruminating and agonizing and worrying, I took the leap this week and hired a searcher to find Adam's birth family. I don't know if I am ready for this, but I couldn't get past the nagging fear that if I waited until he was ready to search, the trail would have gone cold.
I decided that I could take it one step at a time -- get the information in hand and then decide what the next step should be. I'm nervous, but think I'm doing the right thing for Adam.
How Old is Adam?
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8 comments:
Please keep us posted, I would be interested to see how it goes. Good luck!
I think you should always follow your heart on this kinda stuff. You know what is best for Adam and your family.
I know this is such a sensitive/personal matter, but I do want to talk to you about the process and your results because I am leaning the same direction.
I think you are brave. It's a hard call, but the longer you wait I think the harder the search would be, so putting off the decision would really be making the decision that it isn't important. The next hard question, what to do with information you find, will still be out there for you to think on.
I've thought about it and wondered what to do myself.
I think its good. I bet it is scary though for you. How did you go about finding someone to search? I might consider this as well.
You are doing the right thing. It is more than likely that the trail would have gone cold if you let too many years go by. I wish that birthparent search was possible in China, but it really isn't. Because of the one-child policy and the political/social environment, birth parents simply won't come forward.
Oh, I'm dying to see how this goes for you too! We've contacted a P.I. in Vietnam, but haven't made the leap just yet. Would you mind e-mailing me privately if you're comfortable? momwholoveschrist@hotmail.com.
Do you read Owlhaven? Mary is on a trip to Korea and just met the birth parents of one of her sons.
http://www.owlhaven.net/2009/06/06/a-day-of-blessings/
I think what you're doing is amazingly loving.
I think it's great. I am also planning on doing this for Parker - just trying to find a reputable PI or organization to help me. If you have any thoughts on how to choose someone to help search, would love to see you post on that or email privately (cobaltdragons@yahoo.com)
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