How frustrating is the "no update" update? You see the email pop up in your inbox from your
agency and your heart leaps -- and then you open it and see that there is actually no update. Sigh.
This part of the process is excruciating -I hate not being able to do anything to move this forward. Since there truly is nothing I can do except sulk and whine, and those are less than productive
past times, I've decided to try and shift my attitude and focus on the positive things about the waiting period. (I can't swear it will work, but I'm going to try!)
On the positive side, I have had a lot of time to read about adoption issues and child development. I just finished "Attaching in Adoption", which was terrific. I've also read the classic "The Magic Years", and a great book called "Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys".
On Friday, I received "Toddler Adoption" and "Parenting Beyond Belief: On Raising Ethical, Caring Kids Without Religion". I'm very excited to read both of them. (Disclaimer: please please, dear readers, do not take me to task about "Parent Beyond Belief". I completely respect the feeling and beliefs of those whose religious beliefs ares central to their lives. My beliefs are as deeply felt and important to me and have been arrived at after a life time of searching and reading and learning. My mind is not going to be changed on this issue at this point in my life.)
I've had the time to network and become involved in the
internet support community of families with children from Vietnam. I have learned so much from the assorted groups I belong to and the blogs of those who have "been there/done that". Following the blogs of parents as they travel have been especially illuminating and helpful.
I'm starting to take the next step and actually meet people from these lists in my area -- I look forward to getting to know more parents and children and having their support and friendship in our lives once Adam comes home, and being able to give my support and friendship in return.
All this invaluable information and support and friendship -- what did we do before the
internet?
Its time to get started on Adam's room. I've had the crib for over a year, and received most of the other furniture and items at my shower in November. Its going to be a lot of work -- I'm moving into the second bedroom in my apartment and Adam will have the room that is currently mine. So, aside from assembling the crib and dresser/changing table, I've got to move my own furniture and paint. I hope this project can absorb a lot of my attention and distract me from the wait.
Ok, I'm being positive. Do I get rewarded with a REAL update now?
